TELEVISION!

People used to sit around the fire: an armchair either side of it, more chairs or a sofa facing it. And then television came along, and by an apparent universal consensus it went into the corner, on the same wall as the fire. For a generation or two almost all sitting rooms have felt skewed.

So it’s got to go, if only for reasons of spatial harmony. We’ve been discussing it for a few weeks, and last night made the decision: bye-bye box.

We need to give Telewest a month’s notice. We need to find homes for the two tellies we have. We need to get a refund on the License. And then we’ll be ready to go cold turkey from capitalism’s favourite drug.

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